I'm me. No, really.
I suppose my ramblings would make more sense in context. I grew up on a working farm in rural nowhere on the East Coast of the US of A. I've had horses, goats, dogs, birds, cows and chickens- but never a cat. We had snakes for rodent control. I went to a top-rated University, earned my degree in Environmental Studies and Political Science, and now work in Law Enforcement. Because the two are so totally connected.
I define undefined. I'm a poet, a singer, a farmer, a teacher, a warrior, a healer and a whole lot of other things too. That little farm of my not-long-ago youth (hell, I'm still a kid) allowed for one and only one world view: You were Catholic or you were going to Hell and your whole life had better reflect it. I love the beauty, the ritual and the community in my Church. I still do love my God, and I'd be dead without Mary. But I can't take the hypocrisy any more. I never chose to be bisexual and I will not accept their idea that God would deny me because of the way He made me. Someone somewhere made a mistake and I don't think it was the Divine. I'm going to blame the people. Faith I still have, religion- not so much. My spirituality is complex and ever-evolving. The blinders are off, and I've never felt closer to the Divine.
I'm a geek supreme, which inspired the title for this blog. I'm highly social but I rarely form close friendships. I've been told that I'm too arrogant, abrasive, intimidating, dangerous or what have you. Of course I'm dangerous. I am perfectly comfortable at a black-tie event or in the gym or working in the pasture fixing fences. I've met very few people who can keep up with me intellectually. I have held lives in my hands. I've saved them and I've felt them slip between my fingers. It's my job. Hence my name. Imbrium- the rains. Rains give life, or cause destruction depending on the situation.
Scared yet? Don't be. I'm not dangerous unless someone forces me to be. I'm famous for talking my way out of most situations. I'm not violent by nature, I'd rather be gardening. Or cooking. Or playing with critters. Or playing music. Or reading a good book.
I'm just me, after all.
I'm me. No, really.