I now believe that all the badness that is me has led me here. My badness is my goodness. It is my strength and my vision. I see beyond what should be my capability. It has brought me here, back to my deepest fears. Maybe you don’t know what I’m talking about. You only need to know my daughter knows things she shouldn't and fought - continues to fight - her way out. Now I must ask her to do things that I never learned. Things that no one should. If you understand without the explanations, I invite you to join me on a journey that could end with me in a white coat and a room empty of everything but a bed. Tell them I need my notebook. I’ll write in crayon. I don’t care. The battles are theirs but the war is still mine to be had. Spread the words because it’s the silence, the secrets that breathe life into things better left as nightmares - a story that happened to someone else such a long time ago. Join me here and now. Because the smallest victory is worth any amount you ask me to pay. Please forgive the work in progress. I can only offer you my truth.